Also, Six Degrees of Separation Reduced to One, Maybe Two at Most
"When it comes to hiring in this administration," intoned McClelland, matter-of-factly, "The official policy is it's not what you know but who."
Nonplussed by the outburst of shock and outrage his statement prompted from the assembled press corps, McClellan furrowed his brow disdainfully and scolded, "Oh, grow up, people. This is how the world works. Always has, always will."
"We're just being completely up-front about how things get done," McClellan continued, his tone verging on impatience, "There's nothing new here. This White House is packed to the rafters with Ivy League frat boys who got into college on legacy admissions; the Old School Tie is the way they to do things."
The reporters, so flummoxed they couldn't form actual questions, still managed to sputter out the words, "Competence?!", "Experience?!", "Meritocracy?!"
"Oh, please," replied McClellan, rolling his eyes dismissively, "How many of you got here because of your abilities and job performance?"
While the room quieted as the reporters pondered the press secretary's question to them, he forged ahead with more announcements.
"In addition, the only "Who" that you have to know in this case," McClellan said, "Is George W. Bush, or one of his inner circle. The Six Degrees of Separation concept has been integrated into the process but reduced to One, maybe Two Degrees of Separation at the most. We've got jobs to fill and we don't have time to look for someone who's actually qualified, much less the best person, so unless you're a blood relative or former college roommate of somebody pretty high up in this administration," McClellan stated flatly, "Save yourself the stamp, 'cause you're shit outta luck, along with everybody else."
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