Despite "Cruella" Disappointing at the Box Office, Disney to Follow Up with Origin Story Movie About Goofy, Finally Explaining How He’s a Dog but Walks on Two Legs, Wears Clothes, Can Talk and Drive a Car

“At the very least," said a Disney story editor who spoke on condition of anonymity, "This should clear up troubling questions that have been raised about this beloved character's identity and motivations," adding, "I'm hoping we do Jiminy Cricket from Pinocchio next, because, how did that happen? But, it isn’t really up to me. Whomever it is gets chosen the usual way, a blindfolded intern lobs a dart at a wall papered with pictures of Disney characters.”