Ant Farmer's Almanac

Jordan Klepper to Conduct First Post Fox-Firing of Tucker Carlson

The Daily Show correspondent's many years covering MAGA hardliners, white supremacists and Neo nazis makes him uniquely qualified to keep a straight face and continue asking questions despite responses of utter nonsense, rank stupidity and pure evil. "It'll be a challenge with Tucker," admits Klepper, "I've been training for this for a long time," adding, "Not that I'm particularly looking forward to it."

 

Zelenskyy Denies Xi Asked for Dirt on Hunter Biden During Phone Call

Ukranian president Volodymyr Zelenskyy insists that at no point in his historic phone call with Xi Jinping did the Chinese president ask for compromising or embarrassing intel on U.S. president Joe Biden's son, Hunter, "Unless maybe his inquiries about laptop repair shops in Kyiv was supposed to be a hint at something." 

 

 

Joe Alwyn Eagerly Awaiting Taylor Swift's Next Album to Find Out Why She Broke Up With Him

"I'm just hoping it isn't a double album," says Alwyn, "We were together for six years so, she's got a ton of material."